Does this shirt make me look fat? Umm no, actually the huge fat rolls make you look fat. Put the fork down before you hurt someone.

Why this dude agreed to this I have no idea. I can only hope she has been on a steady diet of fava beans to make it extra pungent and spicy.

I guess she REALLY doesn't like anal sex. Or perhaps she doesn't like the fact she's being paid money to go and fuck that ugly cunt.

I can't remember the last time I thought to myself. I would not hit that. Perhaps I have low standards. This is one of those times. Nasty.

Either this chick needs to wash a bit more often or that is a lovely yeast infection. I'd prolly still hit it, pre-lubed and all.

She must either a: Love cum or b: been paid a lot of money. Fantasy dictates option A and she just doesn't want to waste a drop. Plus, spitting is rude.

Why anyone would shove an eel up their totally destroyed asshole and then shit it out escapes me. But then who am I to judge? I like pigeons up my ass.